Immemorial Musing

I’m just not sure what I want.

Do I even want anything?

Is there something I want, or do I want actually nothing itself?

All I find myself longing for is permanent comfort, as much as it is possible.

…

I’ve been having a really tough time lately.

Just getting those words out is a breath of fresh air.

One of my recent posts was about doing a mental health diagnostic test, and I got the results a couple weeks ago.

OCD. Well, I already have known that for years, but it’s professionally recognized now.

But it’s not just that. I actually received a long and detailed report summarizing everything about me that was observed.

My life’s mental health story, summed up concisely and accurately.

It’s something I’ve wanted for a long time.

The results weren’t what I “hoped” for, I don’t have something that I admittedly wanted so that the people around me might actually understand how my mind work, but I have my story in writing, as a sort of proof that I survived everything.

-Immemorial Musing