Immemorial Musing

I just don’t feel good today. Interacting with people just makes me feel not good.

I’ve always had a hard time talking to people. Anyone. Friends, family, teachers, just especially any adult.

I have a day next week that I’m hanging out with old friends and meeting a lot of new people. As you may imagine, this is mainly what’s making me so nervous.

There are so many factors that make something intimidating to me. I think about how I’m going to hold conversations, if I’m going to do something awkward, and even if I just straight up get tired and start thinking “I just want to go home” for half the day.

It makes me mad. Mad at other people for being able to handle social things. Even more mad at other people that thrive with people socially. I could even say I hate those people. I’m trying not to, but in these types of moods, I can’t help but hate myself even for lacking so much.

I feel so drained right now that I’m just going to end this here.

-Immemorial Musing